it's new year's eve today. it means the last day of 2004. it also means that it's countdown today. and fucking hell also means im gonna party till shit comes. i love 2004 seriously,its so damn happening. my retrival of my o level results,my 1st year of poly,clubbing non-stop,getting fucking hell drunk,smoke my way thru all the shit,besties gd friends united,chilling together everyday even thou im broke,met julian and also **** ** *********. ok maybe the 2nd last one is just for a short period of time but it's the best feeling that i've ever had. but how it has turned into an emptiness that seemed that it doesnt wana go away. so now it's gone who can give the the feeling again? who can boost those of mine to the heavens without letting it crumble? i've been in hell,trust me.and it's many fucking levels down. but now slowly,i've been trying to rise up. ok stop those shit or i'm gonna start reminiscing the past which i've been trying hard to forget. plans oh plans for ltr. so it's dinner consisting of > xinny,marc,me,tomo,phia,my bro and maybe phia's sista. after that we'll club at black. seriously it's only been 1 wk since we last went clubbing but why the fuck did it seems so frigging long? maybe cos clubbing have became part of our routine. alrighty so i wish every single person out there a very happy 2004 and hope for an even better 2005. every single year is so precious,so cherish everything you have. seriously. (quote of the day) love out!

its raining its pouring fucking hell cold now. so the pass few days were rather alright. and im glad my friends were with me by my side when the world seemed to be crumbling upon me. a bigsy weegsy thank you to xinny,marc,tomo,farah,phia and andriana. MUAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! and i pierced my tongue,ooooh lala. no pain baby,no pain at all. i've got a heart to heart talk with my bro. it was nice,haven seen him for hell weeks. got to smoke with him,tell him my fucking problems. and he told me his,yes good and he's studying now. thanks bro! life goes on wotever happens. but sometimes u just wished that why the fuck is this happening to me when u thought everything was so beautiful. thou it's so surreal,it's reality. reality oh yes,but it's slowly turning into virtual. i wish i could jus flush all the fucking crap away. but it jus pop up suddenly and slowly kills you,torture you. yes it's a painful and bloody stab in the back. so now i'm still in the middle of the healing process. as cliche as it may sound,time will tell,time will cure everything.

a loud shout out of merry xmas to all babes and dudes. so 2005 is coming,in another 6 days time? time passes damn quickly. sometimes u jus wished that that moment would stay and be stagnant. so 2004 is quite a happening year i must say. i love 2004,but i cant wait for a better 2005. so people said during xmas,love is all ard. yes it's true love is all ard but sometimes it's the special love that u had always yeiled for. i love my gurls and im so glad i have them by my side when im down. when i feel like getting numb,jus crossing the road and let a fucking car hit me down so i wont feel any pain,thrown into an incinerator and just burn me fast,real fast. so wots all this emotional shit all abt? well it's wot im feeling right now,at this fucking moment,25th dec 2004 3.07pm. loads of feelings have been going thru my mind this whole time. ever since 9th dec 2004. so many amazing things happened but yet it left me with doubts. but im ok,im still ok now. just that sometimes i felt really confused and my mind's all in a whirl. so people,please understand me if im acting strangely sometimes. thank you.

the pass few days had been perfect. spending time with my gurlfriends and my baby boy. zouk on saturday night. break beats were nice,the jugs were terribly expensive. we were crazily trigger happy. xinny borrowed and wore a wig. some dudes gave us free drink coupons. i was damn tired today went straight to sleep after i arrive home from sch. ive been trying hard to cut down on my intake of tabacco. and amazing i only had a stick today. yesyes i dont think im gonna buy any packet soon.ok maybe. i think im gonna pierce my tongue this sunday!!fucking cant wait. ok here are some pictures for your craving.

the pass few days had been great. except for boring school which is totally sucky. activites>clubbing,chilling,movies,meeting up with julian. i just totally love 'julian days'. watched national treasure today and i rate it 4 outta 5 stars. went with my darlings. xinn,phia and farah babies. dinner@ scotts and chilling at heeren's nydc. im really damn happy today and the joy is overwhelming. spending time with my girlfriends and meeting up with baby. they are so part of me and i cant imagine my life without them. school ends at 5pm tmr.another boring day at schoool. dammmmmmmmmmmn.

zouk was fabbbbbbulous on friday night. consisting of>me,xinny,tomo,phia,jovi,shar and xinghui. i swear not to order vodka sprite again. it sucks terribly and everyone dint wana drink so i gulped down almost 2 jugs of it. so it does lead to a consequence. getting fucking high and drunk and my legs wont want me to walk straight. but i did not puke.amazing! ciggs did not have any effect on me that day. dance floor was packed like shit. maybe this time a guy's gonna walk into my life all over again after a million yrs. having sch tmr again. i miss my holidays,i want xmas and new yr to arrive fast. my mom's quite angry with me for returning home late everyday. but....................................sigh. winona - it was gd seeing you again u look ohsofine.shall seeya in school more often yeh.

i wana dye my hair mega light brown or jet black. but i cant decide! so fucking boring at home now. but it's too early to go out. i wana do sth exciting,something that thrills me and gives me adrenaline rush. but wot the hell is that?that thing is missing. i think im fucking pms-ing fucking moodswing everything is fucked up. fuck you and you and you and you.

so school hols have finally ended and the new shit term begins! but im still in the ever so happy holiday mood. i still wana party,yesssss i will continue to party. sch was useless today consisting of 45 mins of lecture where the lecturer was jus speaking shit. it's a total waste of time. oooohh wells. went town ltr with kenny cos he wanted to shop. and met up with zq,sean and his gurl. they left shortly after and i met up with phia zai. and both my feet have a total of 5 blisters. wot luck. i cant wait for tues,wed,thurs,fri and sat to arrive!

clubbing twice a wk every wk since the start of the hols. it's the last wk of hols now. im totallllllly brokeee,fuck. xinny twinny and momo are coming back today! i so love them they are alr a part of me. meeting phia and farfar ltr. so i think we're gon eat at phia's club and chill at holland v. chilllll hollllla againnn. and yes sharrr baby i wana groove with you on the dance floor and rock the house down. lovelovelovelovelove.

haven been blogging much i am soooo lazy to come online now. went shopping with phia ytd. stuffs i bought:

a tube

2 pairs of earrings

a pair of slips

i think i should get more slips and i saw this at reef which i fucking love. it was sucha long day. chill oh baby and farahh joined us soon after. school's gon start soon,total shit. so im so gonna make full use of this wk. helllllllaaa party tonightt ooooooooooooohhh.