so many shits bombard me at a time. please spare me off all this torment. i cant stand it,i really dont know wot to do. why are all thia happening to me? i know ive disappointed my parents,im sorry. but please understand me too? i would not wana eleborate any further. i'm trying to hold back my tears and put on a strong front. so many things to juggle at a time. family,friends,my bf and studies. family - you dont talk to me when i go home. you dont ask like a "how is your day in school?" or "do you have enough to spend this week do u need more?" thats why i dont feel like going home early.wot can i do when i go home early?be a coach potato? cope myself up in the room and blast loud music? friends - seriously saying,i feel quite left out during sat's liquid room. you guys were going trigger happy yes. i aint in most of the photos. and normally i would be in most of the photos. wot im trying to say isnt bout the fotos,but...........i dont know maybe ive neglect you guys. but i dont wana feel neglected by you guys.cos you guys are the only people whom ive known for many years.you people were there for me when i was at my most confused state.i really wana spend time with you people but outings and meetings were always set so late.and now that i've got limited cash,i really dont know wot to do.my dear friends,please understand.i need all of your support to keep me going strong. bf - baby you've been there for me when im at my lowest point.i love you and you're the one who completed my life.you are the only person that can make me smile.i know we do have many quarrels and bickerings but all this aint gonna be an obstacle between us.all the quarrels we had would be lessons learnt to perfect our relationship.we are always troubled by monetary issues. and you seemed so down ytd when we had that long talk which made me miss many buses.but it was all well worth it.yes i do wana enjoy all the shopping and splurging of money.if u ask me why all our allowance dried up so fast before even approaching the end of the week,i really dont know.money jus come and go,in a snap.i know we've tried many ways to save and use money wisely and it aint working,we can try again.i dont wana give up baby.i need you to help me too.2 brains work better than 1 and we need 2 hands in order to clap.alright baby? studies - studies had been all going okay for me. no problems occured and i jus hope to pass my marco econs which i had failed last semester. and i jus hope i can pass all my modules and not retain. i thought i would jus like to write all this down to lessen my burden in me. i dont need any sympathy from anyone or any fuckers who thought i might be acting like a drama queen. this is jus wot im feeling now and only those who are close to me understands.